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April 2004
Posts: 795
Location: Texas | All I can think of is:
Sorry, I have to walk my dog. You know dogs. They need their exercise.
PLEASE HELP!!!
:eek: |
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Joined:
March 2005
Posts: 2791
Location: Atlanta, GA. | "I'm already married"!
"I went to a wedding ONCE before. Didn't care for how it turned out".
"I always crack-up when they start playing 'Here comes the bride'". |
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January 2002
Posts: 14127
Location: 6 String Ranch | I vote #2 |
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March 2002
Posts: 1380
Location: Central Oregon | "My only good T shirt has obscenity on the front." |
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November 2005
Posts: 4832
Location: Campbell River, British Columbia | You don't want me there. I snore. |
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August 2002
Posts: 8307
Location: Tennessee | I Knew The Bride When She Used to Rock and Roll - Nick Lowe |
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September 2006
Posts: 10777
Location: Keepin' It Weird in Portland, OR | My parole officer won't allow me to go into that neighborhood. |
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Joined:
March 2002
Posts: 14842
Location: NJ | "I'm sorry, I can't go to your Wedding . .
. . but, I PROMISE to make it to th'NextOne . . "
WorksEveryTime. |
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January 2006
Posts: 2120
Location: Chicago | I'll attend on Facebook. |
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January 2006
Posts: 5881
Location: Colorado Rocky Mountains | I go with Cliff's response. |
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Joined:
December 2001
Posts: 10583
Location: NJ | Originally posted by cliff:
"I'm sorry, I can't go to your Wedding . .
. . but, I PROMISE to make it to th'NextOne . . "
WorksEveryTime. I think I actually sent that to temp when he got married |
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Joined:
June 2003
Posts: 1792
Location: Rego Park, NY, | Sergio,
You of all people have the best excuse.All you have to do is say" I just booked a 6 month gig. I'll be on the road starting...(What day did you say the wedding is?)". ;) |
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Joined:
December 2003
Posts: 13996
Location: Upper Left USA | "I'll check with my voices, how many of us can attend?"
"What should I wear, the Remmington or the Browning?"
"Only if there's a clear line between the Groom's side and the Bride's side of the Cousins!" |
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September 2005
Posts: 3619
Location: GATLINBURG TENNESSEE :) | I think I'm coming down with something ... it could be the swine flu. |
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Joined:
September 2002
Posts: 806
Location: Seymour, Tennessee | "I have to report to prison on that day."
"I have to be in court for my final sentencing hearing that day."
"Who the hell are you?" |
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February 2004
Posts: 2487
| Thank them, then send them some super high prices for acoustic entertainment. |
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Joined:
May 2003
Posts: 4389
Location: Capital District, NY, USA Minor Outlying Islands | I'm guessing that the truth won't work? Sometimes that's the easiest. since that's the case, just say you have a prior committment to:
a)gig (that was a good one)
b)work
c)bought non refundable tickets for a ski trip
Just ignore it, and maybe it'll go away. |
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Joined:
March 2005
Posts: 12759
Location: Boise, Idaho | It might not work if the truth is:
1. You don't know me, but only invited me so I'd bring a gift;
2. My trip to the wedding will probably last longer than the marriage;
3. What's the point of making it "legal" after all these years? I can think of a lot more entertaining events that won't cost me as much.
I actually asked the last question recently and was told that she was pregnant again and figured she'd never be able to get into her wedding dress after this one. |
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Joined:
March 2005
Posts: 2791
Location: Atlanta, GA. | Uh Sergio... this is NOT your wedding, is that correct???
If so, we'll hafta refer to a different chapter in the "excuse book". |
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Joined:
March 2002
Posts: 14842
Location: NJ | Hep C. |
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Joined:
November 2004
Posts: 4413
| Best Excuse For Not Attending A Wedding....
You could end up married. |
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Joined:
April 2004
Posts: 795
Location: Texas | No, this is not my wedding, I have been happily married for 26 years.
It is a family wedding and I got to find the best excuse not to attend.
There are many good ones here, thanks guys, please keep'em coming.
:cool:
Serge |
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Joined:
January 2009
Posts: 4535
Location: Flahdaw | Originally posted by Country Artist:
please keep'em coming.
:cool:
Serge Okay, you asked for it. Try this....
"Well, witnessing your fiancee commit to going from 5 guys down to just one will be worth it!"
If you don't get un-invited, at least they won't care that you don't show up. |
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Joined:
December 2009
Posts: 143
Location: Ontario Canada | Originally posted by Country Artist:
No, this is not my wedding, I have been happily married for 26 years.
It is a family wedding and I got to find the best excuse not to attend.
There are many good ones here, thanks guys, please keep'em coming.
:cool:
Serge Isn't family wonderful. You said.... I have been happily married for 26 years.
Jimbob said....You have no choice. Especially if it is SWMBO family. |
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November 2005
Posts: 4832
Location: Campbell River, British Columbia | "I'm old enough to do what I want and live with the consequences. I'm not going." |
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Joined:
March 2008
Posts: 2683
Location: Hot Springs, S.D. | Just tell 'em you woke up with a migraine. |
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Joined:
December 2009
Posts: 143
Location: Ontario Canada | Originally posted by CanterburyStrings:
Just tell 'em you woke up with a migraine. Is that a guy from Migraineia?
Regards
Jim |
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Joined:
March 2005
Posts: 12759
Location: Boise, Idaho | It's probably too late for this one, but you could make a few comments that my dad made at my niece's wedding and you'll never be invited to another one.
They cross the political, religion and basic decency lines, so I can't repeat them here. |
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Joined:
October 2006
Posts: 5575
Location: big island | will the wedding be in texas? perhaps texas will still be buried in snow by then... |
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Joined:
November 2005
Posts: 4832
Location: Campbell River, British Columbia | Magic solution: syrup of ipecac
preceded by a heavy lunch. Guarantees an early exit when you just. can't. get. out. of. it. |
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November 2009
| Fake a heart attack. |
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Joined:
August 2007
Posts: 494
Location: Location Location Location | 3 out of 4 marriages end in divorce. Yours will be the 4th wedding I've attended this year. Do you really want me there? |
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Joined:
May 2009
Posts: 325
Location: Utica, NY | How about "We're getting the old band back together and would like to do a little something special at your wedding":
http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/video/clips/band-reunion-at-... |
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Joined:
May 2008
Posts: 4996
Location: Phoenix AZ | Why go through all the excuses, isn't telling the truth always the cleanest deal?
"Thanks for the invite, but I don't choose to attend." |
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Joined:
December 2009
Posts: 30
| Wedding, great with all them gifts you'll be getting I been meaning to ask you about borrowing some money. That ought to get you uninvited. |
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Joined:
April 2006
Posts: 1017
Location: Budd Lake, NJ | We actually got an invitation to a wedding once that we declined to go to because neither one of us recognized the names of either the bride or the groom, the home address where the invitation came from--absolutely nothing rang a bell with us. We declined, along with a note that basically said, "Please forgive us, but we're getting older now, and we can't remember where we know you from; we do thank you for your kind invitation, but we won't be able to come." Plus it was in North Carolina, at a time when Jack's work made it inconvenient for us to leave and travel that far for people we honestly couldn't place. (And, trust me, we tried.)
None of our close friends suddenly stopped speaking to us after that; we never did figure out who the happy couple were......and maybe by now it's "was." (Play "Twilight Zone" theme here.)
--Karen |
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Joined:
June 2005
Posts: 1320
Location: Round Rock, TX | Dude... It's family. It's a wedding. You suck it up and go. Squeeze your wife's hand during the vows. Take her out on the dance floor. Getcha some free refreshments at the reception. Come home with your family relationships maintained and reflect that it really wasn't all that bad after all. |
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Joined:
March 2008
Posts: 2683
Location: Hot Springs, S.D. | Wilblee, your answer is the best by far, in my mind. |
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Joined:
November 2005
Posts: 4832
Location: Campbell River, British Columbia | Not necessarily. When there might be drive-by-shootings included in the celebrations, best to stay home without irritating ANYone. |
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Joined:
July 2003
Posts: 3111
Location: Nashville TN. | explain about that incontinence problem |
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OT: Best Excuse For Not Attending A Wedding...Please help!