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OT: Hardest thing I've ever done
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Forums Archive -> The Vault: 2008 | Message format |
BT717 |
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Joined: October 2007 Posts: 2711 Location: Vernon CT | Sorry to bring something so personal "here" but I feel a bond with many of you even though we have never meet. I had to go down to say my goodbyes to my Father. He has Prostrate cancer which went to his bones and 2 weeks ago to his Brain. I told him he could close his eyes and rest. That we will be ok and be there for each other. Very difficult to see a man with the pride he had in that condition. Hospice said could be hours or a day or two. Many of you have gone through this, some recently with a loved one. It's not easy for anyone of us, but with the support we all give each other in "bad" times, it help tremendously. A special thank-you and shout out to Mike (Crimsonlake) for taking the time to figure out a song for me, "Short trip home".We were going to play it on Christmas Day for my Dad along with Edelwiess and a few others of his faivorite Holiday songs, but, due to his Illness , never got the chance. I found out today from my sister that we will be playing it at my Father's Memorial service in March. Mike's generosity and selflesness is what makes this group special. Thank-you for allowing me to express my feelings and loss. Bob | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
stephent28 |
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Joined: April 2004 Posts: 13303 Location: Latitude 39.56819, Longitude -105.080066 | Sorry to hear especially this time of year. When my dad passed away I was also able to talk to him and listen to his instructions for taking care of mom. Sad to see someone who was rarely ever sick to succumb to a cancer. At least you had the comfort of being able to visit with him that one last time. I always feel sorry for those who never properly get to say goodbye to a loved one because of sudden tragedy. Take care. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
Slipkid |
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Joined: September 2003 Posts: 9301 Location: south east Michigan | I'm sorry for your loss. I hope you find comfort in being able to say goodbye. It doesn't always happen that way. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
CrimsonLake |
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Joined: August 2006 Posts: 3145 Location: Marlton, NJ | Bob, My heart goes out to you and your family for what you are going through. I went through something similar with my Grandfather a few years ago and it is gut-wrenching to see someone go through such drastic changes so quickly. Music is something that I - that we all - love and it means so much to me that there is some meaning to it. The fact that you and your Sister will be playing the song will mean so much to your family and will help to keep your Dad's memory alive. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
Tim in Yucaipa |
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Joined: August 2003 Posts: 2246 Location: Yucaipa, California | I feel for you Bob. I went through that with both parents several years ago and just letting them know that it's "ok to go" can sometimes be the best thing you can do for them. It's also "ok to grieve"...don't swallow it and keep it inside.... | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
schroeder |
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Joined: November 2004 Posts: 4413 | I know what you're going through. My sympathies. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
lanaki |
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Joined: October 2006 Posts: 5575 Location: big island | aloha bob, i extend my heartfelt prayers and sympathies also. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
MusicMishka |
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Joined: March 2005 Posts: 5563 Location: Blue Ridge Mountains | Bob, I've also been through this w/my Dad years ago...it's tough but you are blessed to have been able to be with him...as Brad said, it doesn't always work out that way... We will be lifting you and your family up during this difficult time... | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
G8r |
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Joined: November 2006 Posts: 3969 | Bob, you have our heartfelt thoughts and prayers in this tough time. My dad succumbed to pancreatic cancer in the space of 6 weeks. When he was diagnosed he was still walking 5 miles a day (in his early 80's). It's very hard to see such a rapid decline in someone who was such a strong and vital part of you, but take comfort in being able to say your goodbyes, and knowing how proud you made him by how you live your life. Our deepest sympathies. Serge | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
Jeff W. |
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Joined: November 2003 Posts: 11039 Location: Earth·SolarSystem·LocalInterstellarCloud·Local Bub | My condolences. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
Waskel |
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Joined: February 2005 Posts: 11840 Location: closely held secret | Bob, my deepest sympathies as well, and my prayers. In any group like this you will find many who can relate to exactly what you are going through - you are not alone. Christmas Eve we said goodbye to a very close friend... much more like a sister, whose lymphoma had migrated to her brain. We held a memorial service for her Sunday. I lead the music, and it was one of the hardest days of my life. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
Weaser P |
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Joined: October 2005 Posts: 5330 Location: Cicero, NY | Sorry for your loss, Bob. Glad you had a few moments to share with him before he passed. | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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Jonmark Stone |
Joined: May 2008 Posts: 1555 Location: Indiana February will be 8 years for me. | Remember the good Bob. | | Trader Jim |
Joined: June 2006 Posts: 7307 Location: South of most, North of few Bob, you are in my prayers. It was great talking with you tonight. Be strong my friend. | | | stonebobbo |
Joined: August 2002 Posts: 8307 Location: Tennessee My dad too fought the valiant fight ... he so wanted to be strong and beat the small cell carcinoma that ate him up. I spent the last five weeks with him at his home and then in hospital. He lived in the Netherlands and I think it was harder for the other family members back in California. I still remember clasping his hand and telling him it was OK if he had to go ... that I would make sure everyone, especially his wife, would be taken care of. I felt a great weight lift from him, and then he was gone. Yes it was hard. But I wouldn't trade the memory for anything. | Both you and your Father are two very lucky men. Peace be with you. | | guitarwannabee |
Joined: January 2006 Posts: 1478 Location: Michigan We all will grieve with you Bob .That is the nice thing here you have another 7000 friends that are standing by your side.My condolences.GWB | | | Bluebird |
Joined: May 2002 Posts: 1445 Location: Nova Scotia, Canada Very sorry to hear of your loss, Bob. | | | CanterburyStrings |
Joined: March 2008 Posts: 2683 Location: Hot Springs, S.D. Bob, I am so sorry. You are in my prayers.I held my mom's hand while she passed, and I know it was harder on me than it was on her. She was so worried about her 17 year old dog that she couldn't let go. Well, the dog had died earlier that same day, and when I told her "I've got one hand, and Jesus has the other. Go with Him and He'll take you home to see Daddy. And Buttons will meet you there too." She smiled, and then she died. Now I've got to go dry my eyes. | | | mtnbikerfred |
Joined: March 2005 Posts: 1421 Location: Orange County, California Prayers and condolences Bob. I had a customer and friend for years who despite looking and feeling pretty good, found out he was dying of cancer. Saying goodbye sucks. | | | TOPDOGJIM |
Joined: February 2008 Posts: 158 Location: South Windsor Connecticut Sorry to hear that Bob. Stay strong Bob, I will be praying for you and your family. | Jim | | cpotter73 |
Joined: September 2008 Posts: 42 Location: Crossville, TN You and yours are in my prayers and thoughts Bob. | | | 2ifbyC |
Joined: | December 2006 Posts: 6268 Location: Florida Central Gulf Coast Bob, | My heart aches with your loss. It's so difficult to say 'good-bye for now'! Peace and rich blessings to you and yours... | | fillhixx |
Joined: November 2005 Posts: 4827 Location: Campbell River, British Columbia Big hug. Wish we could ease your loss. | | | sligoman |
Joined: October 2007 Posts: 283 Location: Portland, OR It is never easy. Words don't help much except that they impart the message that everyone goes through it. | I think I saw this song posted here last year, but it is particularly appropriate, I think: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8590o8A4iU8 | | |
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